Three Things That Should Never Happen at McDonald’s

MH at the ER

My two-year-old fell at McDonald’s on Sunday night and hurt her nose.  I was not lovin’ it, especially when the doctor at the ER said that her nose was broken.  He said that she would need to see an ear, nose, and throat specialist to determine the course of action to take.  I imagined surgeries that would cause her poor little nose to look similar to the nose of a retired boxer, but without the money and titles to show for it. 

The ENT appointment was yesterday afternoon and upon further review she does not have a broken nose after all.  She does have massive trauma and swelling.  The doctor said that her nose will eventually be every color of the rainbow before it heals completely.  But at least it isn’t broken.

McDonald’s is a place where you should be able to get “food” at a low price.  It should never be a place where you break your nose.  Here are three other things that should never take place at McDonald’s:

1.  Weight Watchers Meetings.  I have been on a Weight Watchers diet before; counting points and trying to game the system.  It worked to lower my weight, but it also made me a little crazy.  I started to view McDonald’s as the Promised Land flowing with milkshakes and honey mustard.  Making a group of people who are losing their minds while losing weight meet at McDonald’s would be a bad idea.  Another bad idea: teaching your toddler how to say flatulence.  It’s funny, but your spouse probably won’t think so.

2.  Marriage Proposals.  Marriage proposals should take place somewhere romantic, in a setting that evokes heightened emotions.  They should not happen in a place that features ketchup pumps and a playland.  There are some exceptions to this, of course.  Like if you met at McDonald’s. Or if you own a McDonald’s franchise.  Or if you are Ronald McDonald.  And if you are Ronald McDonald, I have some shoes you can borrow.

My Clown Shoes

3.  Rap Battles.  Rap battles should take place on the street or in dimly lit, abandoned warehouses.  They should never take place in well-lit restaurants with innocent children present.  Or in a place where the participants can buy Happy Meals afterward.  Have I ever been involved in a rap battle?  Only in my mind.  And I was awesome.

I have spent too much time at McDonald’s restaurants over the course of my life and I have spent way too much time thinking about what shouldn’t be done at McDonald’s while writing this blog post.  I’m sure that there are more things that probably shouldn’t be done there, but what is more important is what should be done there.  And everywhere else for that matter.

While Jesus was speaking with “the woman at the well,” the topic came up about where people should worship; whether in Jerusalem where the Jews worshipped or on the mountain where the Samaritans worshipped.  Jesus said,

Believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither
onthis mountain nor in Jerusalem…..Yet a time is coming and
has now comewhen the true worshipers will worship the Father
in the Spirit and in truth,for they are the kind of worshipers
the Father seeks. God is spirit,and his worshipers must worship
in the Spirit and in truth.
John 4:21, 23-24

Wherever we are, God is worthy of worship.

In McDonald’s, in a church building, in an abandoned warehouse, on the street—He is worthy.

The where of worship doesn’t matter; the how of worship matters immensely.

God deserves and requires that we worship Him in Spirit and in truth.


(What else should never take place at McDonald’s?  Where have you worshipped God today?  Share away?)


49 thoughts on “Three Things That Should Never Happen at McDonald’s

  1. Great post Matt. So many people only worship at church. Which is sad. It is so much more freeing to see that anywhere you are can be a place of worship.

    For me McDonald’s should never be a place you eat FISH! Yuck!

    • Amen on both statements. I hear a lot of folks say that they are going to church or are going to have church. This is an incorrect statement that really does impact how $any people view worship.

      Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

  2. No one should ever bathe in the bathroom sink at McDonalds.

    Open heart surgery should never take place at McDonalds although it could be the cause

    An engine overhaul should never take place in the McDonalds parking lot

    Sword swallowing should never take place at McDonalds

    Cat juggling should never take place at McDonalds

    Paintball should never take place at McDonalds

    Hope the little one recovers quickly


  3. High powered business lunches complete with guys in suits who occasionnally glance at thier new iphone just to let everyone know they have one. I think chicken Mcnuggets (or any food with “Mc” as a prefix) would ruin the over all “power” effect.

    Romans 12:1. . Offering our lives a living sacrifice (worship) happens daily. Sorry about your daughters nose.

  4. I love your shoes :)! Totally awesome. I’m thinking McDonald’s should not be a place for vegetarians to meet. Their salads are not much to speak of. 🙂 Happy Wednesday!

  5. “In McDonald’s, in a church building, in an abandoned warehouse, on the street—He is worthy.”

    Um…do you have a mother-in-law? (Just kidding!)

  6. “I watched a pack of wild dogs take over and successfully run a Wendy’s!” — Tracy Jordan. What? it applies!

    What do I think should never happen at the Mickey of Dees? Surgery.

  7. I’m so sorry about her poor little nose! Ouch!

    Call me old fashioned, but I think a first date should never happen at McDonald’s. Unless you’re 15, there really isn’t any excuse to take your lady to Micky D’s and tell her, “You can even get the extra large Big Mac meal deal. (insert creepy wink here)”. To be clear, that didn’t happen to me. It happened to….a friend. After you’re in a relationship, then I think it’s totally legit to swing by the Golden Arches. Timing is everything.

    BONUS: I’m thinking…no bagpipes at McDonald’s.

  8. I may be in the minority here, but I think rapping is perfectly adequate in a MC D’s. Just saying.

    As to what should never happen in a McDonalds? Diarrhea. Yup, their bathrooms are disgusting.

    • Rapping is fine anywhere, but rap battles with people throwing their hands in the air and waving them like they just don’t care can be dangerous.

      And you’re right–spending too much time in their restrooms is a baaaad idea.
      Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

  9. My family used to have kids’ birthday parties at McDonalds. How sad…No wonder I was so plump as a child. This should never happen.

  10. “In McDonald’s, in a church building, in an abandoned warehouse, on the street—He is worthy.”

    It always bothers me when people put a special holy factor on their church buildings – like God is more present there than he is at their house or on the street or in McDonald’s (ok – maybe God really isn’t in McD’s. Their food is designed to kill us after all). God is everywhere, and deserves to be worshipped everywhere.

    Great post man!

    • It seems that our words can also alter our behavior. We wouldn’t do certain things “in church” that we would do elsewhere. Knowing that we are the Church wherever we are hopefully reduces this mindset.
      Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

  11. I think worship should be an everyday, all-the-time affair, and the church building is place where we come together to celebrate what God has been doing in our lives that week.

    Good word, Matt!

  12. no proposals, for sure, but I’m going to go ahead and say it, because I’m pretty sure it’s happened, no Wedding Receptions!

    That’s not to say that I don’t want any future rehearsal dinner at IHOP. I do. I’m going to make it happen, and probably try to aim for Free Pancake Thursday for that blessed event, because how better to celebrate?

    Worshiping God can and should be done everywhere. Pray without ceasing.

    • I agree with the comedian who said that IHOP should be called ICANBARELYMOVE or INEEDANAP. But to each his or her own 🙂
      Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

  13. Sorry about your daughter’s poor lil’ nose. Glad it isn’t broken.

    I had this weird visual of Eminem having a rap battle with the Burger-lar.

  14. i think u should sue if thats the way of the lord 🙂
    ive got to admit a rap battle at mcdonalds would be hilarious

  15. i have a question

    i have a friend who steels from tesco
    his family has big money problems and are struggling
    should i tell the fuzz ??

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s