Here is a link to the only blog post that I read over the weekend: Rob Bell: Universalist? It basically asserts that Bell, in his soon to be released book Love Wins, argues that everyone ends up in Heaven.
Here is my response: I love Rob Bell.
1. I love Rob Bell because I hate traditional paragraphs. I tried to start a “Down with Paragraphs” club in high school, but the english teachers put a stop to it by making me an offer I couldn’t refuse. Those were some well-connected old ladies. I’m not sure that Bell hates traditional paragraphs, but it seems like he does.
Because he writes like this.
And I like people who write like this.
Because I know that it bothers english teachers.
And english teachers deserve to be bothered.
2. I love Rob Bell because of his glasses. Who can wear glasses that look like they should come with a fake nose and fake bushy eye-brows and still seem super cool? Rob Bell. Who is jealous of this? Me. Who has the innate ability to make cool looking glasses appear terribly un-cool? Me again. Who put the bop in the bop shoo bop shoo bop? Not me. Definitely not me.
3. I love Rob Bell because he can walk and talk at the same time while using overly dramatic hand gestures. The types of hand gestures that he uses are nearly impossible to do while stationary, yet he does them again and again while walking, talking, and looking directly into a camera. He is the Chuck Norris of walking and talking at the same time.
4. I love Rob Bell because when he was in a band that played “northern gospel” music. I assume that northern gospel music is similar to southern gospel music, but with fewer truncated words like “fixin’,” “gonna,” or “pow’r.” And it probably features a violin instead of a fiddle.
All of these are reasons why I love Rob Bell, but the main reason that I love Rob Bell is because I know God.
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God.
Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.
Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
1 John 4:7-8
As of right now, it is unclear whether or not Rob Bell can be considered a universalist. There are signs that he is; I understand this. If so, I will be disappointed because I believe that Hell is just as real as Heaven and that many people really will spend an eternity apart from God. If Rob Bell teaches universalism, I will not love his theology.
But I will still love Rob Bell.
Because God will still love Rob Bell.
And because God will still love me.
(Why do you love Rob Bell? What do you think about non-traditional paragraphs? What do you think about universalism? Share away!)